Birthday Reflections

On Monday I turned a year older. As I've moved up in age my feelings towards my birthday have altered and it has now become a day where I think about where I am in life and just be disappointed. When I was younger I more or less thought I would have it together in my 20s but the reality is the complete opposite. 

A friend asked me how it felt being 24. I honestly feel the same. When I think about it I don't really feel my age, I feel disassociated from it almost. Like I said when I was younger I was expecting to feel like more an adult, someone who has a job and their life together. I am failing my own expectations. I prefer not to think about my age and just go about day by day trying to figure out stuff.

I'm someone who likes to plan. With my career I know what my end point is and I more or less know how to get there. At the moment I'm kind of blocked by not having a job, a steady income so I can become more independent and also go back to studying. I'm planning on doing a Museums degree at Massey which is done via distance learning but there are a couple of times where I would have to go to in class workshops which are in Wellington.

With that I feel like I'm stuck at a crossroads. At the moment I can't seem to find a suitable part time job. So do I continue my current volunteering and take up some more volunteer roles at different museums or do I stop and try to get a full time job. This is the current dilemma of my life. I also need to get over myself and start learning to drive.

So this turned into a ramble type post. Here's to you who kept reading.

Ashley xx